We took a trip to Washington, DC for the New Year.

New Year's itself was a total bust, but entirely enjoyable nonetheless. Were there any fireworks at all in DC? A little bit of our particular story:

Eddie does the internet chat thing quite a bit. Eddie had made some internet friends in DC whose phone numbers he had on hand and whom he managed to call to arrange some vague new year's plans. So we head out to engage these plans. We get on the hotel shuttle, get driven to the Pentagon City metro station, where eddie realizes that he left the phone numbers in the hotel room. rather than ride the shuttle back to the hotel and get the number, eddie calls the hotel to see if they can get someone to run upstairs, grab the number, and read it to him over the phone.

Needless to say, since it's 10:30pm on New Year's Eve, the only person on the clock at the hotel has to watch the front desk; they do say, however, that there might be an extra hand around in a minute.

So we get on the train and ride to Foggy Bottom (snicker), where we're supposed to meet these people--after Eddie calls them to let them know that we're there (if he were to have the number...). Once we arrive, just in case, Eddie checks around, checks the phonebook, calls the hotel again where there's still no one around to help us, digs around for his metro ticket so he can wander around outside and see if they showed up (Eddie had a very hard time keeping ahold of his tickets... we knicknamed him "Pockets" on the second day of the trip), and finally around 11pm gave up, and we got back on the train.

About 15 minutes later, it occurs to me to check the little metro map I have in my pocket, 'cause none of the past few stops sounded familiar. Sure enough, not only had we boarded the wrong train, we had done so in the wrong direction somehow, and so we detrained at Church Falls or something like that. Above-ground stop. Very cold.

Luckily Bay had beers in his knapsack, and we were all itching to sing Auld Lang Syne, so we did, and the only other people around, apparently another group of lost tourists, heckled us. We sang louder.

Around 11:45, the inbound train came through and we hopped on, not really knowing at this point that absolutely nothing was going on in the manner of large public displays in historic DC. 11:55 and we got off at the federal triangle stop, convinced that the mall would be lit up and filled with explosive patriotic fervor.

Julie and Bay ran outside, I was right behind, and Eddie, bless his heart, was digging through his pockets. 11:59 and I was yelling, "Just hop over! Just hop over!" but no, he wouldn't, and at 12:02 he found the ticket, we bolted up into the Reagan something-or-another, popped the champaigne, and swigged away. More Auld Lang Syne, and louder.

After wishing a couple of passers-by a happy new year, I realized I had to pee really really bad. It was around this point that we realized no massive public display was going on, and, as we headed down Pennsylvania Ave, we couldn't help but notice that the block was blacked out around the White House. Gotta pee gotta pee.

So we ran into a cop, asked if there was anywhere around to pee. He laughed at me. Told me I was so out of luck. Laughed again.

I won't tell you where we ended up peeing; my shame is still too great.

Anyway, we head toward the mall and hear some lone screeching voices near the Washington Monument. Turns out that there was a group of exchange students and tourguides there, the former contingent bitching about there being no fireworks in sight.

Assume, fair reader, that there were 12 conversations going on at once, once the poorly mixed but well-pocketed drinks were passed about, once we had all finished a brief round of Auld Lang Syne, and once I had thought it appropriate to ask a canned question: What Did You Learn in 2001? Could you please write it down, for posterity's sake?

I had asked this question the night before in a Brooklyn bar. Friends and strangers wrote on bar napkins their previous-year-lessons, profound, profane, and not-worth-the-paper-upon-which-they-were-printed.

(The images of the collected bar napkins will be posted soon.)